Vampires Should Never Say Uh-oh!!

People Fidget. They Are Compelled To Look Engaged In An Activity, Or Purposeful. Vampires Can Just Occupy Space Without Feeling Obliged To Justify It.

If This Were The Fifties, She’d Be Checking Sam’s Collars For Lipstick Stains. (did People Do That Anymore? Why Did Women Kiss Collars, Anyway? Besides, Sam Almost Always Wore T-shirts.)

For Awhile I Taped Soap Operas And Watched Them At Night When I Thought I Might Be Forgetting What It Was Like To Be Human. After A While I Stopped, Because From The Examples I Saw On Those Shows, Forgetting Humanity Was A Good Thing.

Woo Woo, Secret Vampire Stuff!

I Have Lived One Step Away From Losing My Mind For Years. I Am Quick And Accurate In Spotting Unstable Streaks In Others.