These Pretzels Are Making Me Thirsty!

I Wish I Was A Phone Machine. I Wish If I Saw Somebody On The Street I Didn't Want To Talk To I Could Just Go, "excuse Me, I'm Not Here Right Now, If You Just Leave A Message, I Can Walk Away."

I Won't Do Something Unless I Can Get At Least Two Or Three Good Laughs Out Of It. If I Can't, It's Not Gonna Make The Team.

A Movie Is Kind Of Like Being The Captain Of A Ship, Which Is Nice, But When I Perform By Myself It's Just Surfing On The Water And Nobody Really Knows What Happens.

Why Does That Pharmacist Have To Be Two And A Half Feet Higher Than Everybody Else? Who The Hell Is This Guy? "clear Out, Everybody. I'm Working With Pills Up Here. I'm Taking Them From This Big Bottle And Then I'm Gonna Put Them In The Little Bottle. That's My Whole Job. I Can't Be Down On The Floor With You People."

If Every Instinct You Have Is Wrong, Then The Opposite Would Have To Be Right.