There Is Now A $5 Million Dollar

The Lead Story On Msnbc Was The News That There Was Nothing New To Report In The Gary Condit Story. So Remember When There Is Nothing New To Report, Msnbc Will Be The Station Not To Report It First.

It's Cold Out. It's Even Cold In Florida. So Cold Today That Katherine Harris Put On A Third Layer Of Makeup.

John Kerry Was The Big Winner In Iowa. Ted Kennedy Introduced Kerry As The 'comeback Kid.' That Used To Be Bill Clinton's Name - Because Every Time He Would Come Back To A City, He Would Find Out If He Had A Kid Or Not.

I Love All These Politicians, They All Say The Same Thing - 'we'll Give California Back To The People.' Yeah, Great, Now That It's Not Worth Anything, They Want To Give It Back To Us.

I Guess We Didn't Even Officially Apologize. Jesse Jackson Called On The United States To Officially Apologize To The Chinese. Jesse Said, 'an Apology Is Not A Sign Of Weakness.' And As President Clinton Has Taught Us, An Apology Isn't Even A Sign You're Sorry.