There Are Several Ways To Apportion The

There Are Several Natural Phenomena Which I Shall Have To Have Explained To Me Before I Can Keep On Going As A Resident Member Ofthe Human Race. One Is The Metamorphosis Which Hats And Suits Undergo Exactly One Week After Their Purchase, Whereby They Are Changed From Smart, Intensely Becoming Articles Of Apparel Into Something Children Use When They Want To "dress Up Like Daddy.

Who Said Time Machines Haven't Been Built Yet? They Already Exist. They're Called Books

The Free-lance Writer Is A Man Who Is Paid Per Piece Or Per Word Or Perhaps.

Other Men Wear White Suits In Summer And It Doesn't Seem To Bother Them. But My White Suit Seems To Be A Little Whiter Than Theirs. I Think Also That It May Have Something Written On The Back Of It, Although I Can't Find It When I Take The Suit Off.

A Man Of Forty Today Has Nothing To Worry Him But Falling Hair, Inability To Button The Top Button, Failing Vision, Shortness Of Breath, A Tendency Of The Collar To Shut Off All Breathing, Trembling Of The Kidneys To Whatever Tune The Orchestra Is Playing, And A General Sense Of Giddiness When The Matter Of Rent Is Brought Up. Forty Is Life's Golden Age.