There Are Only Three Things Women Need

Actually, I Think All Addiction Starts With Soda. Every Junkie Did Soda First. But No One Counts That. Maybe They Should. The Soda Connection Is Clear. Why Isn't A Presidential Commission Looking Into This? Or At Least Some Guys From The National Carbonation Council.

I've Been Married For 10 Years And, You Know, It's Hard, You Spruce It Up And You Go Places. How Do You Spruce Up Anything? Artificially. You Go Places And Do Things.

Early In My Career It Was Very Important That I Gain The Reputation. I Haven't Been On The Road In Two Or Three Years, But When I Say Tickets Are On Sale, I Know They're Going To Be Gone, Even If My Movie Bombed Or My Tv Show Sucked.

Kennedy Didn't Beat Nixon. Satire Beat Nixon.

See... Relationships Are Hard, Man. For Order, For Any Relationship To Work, Both People Have To Be On The Same Page, Both People Have To Have The Same Focus, And We All Know What That Page Is. We All Know What That Focus Is. In Order For The Relationship To Work Both People Have To Have The Same Focus, And What's That Focus? That Focus Is All About Her! It's All About Her!