The Whole Object Of Comedy Is To

I Think It's Funny To Be Delicate With Subjects That Are Explosive.

It Reminds Me Of Like This Pathetic Friend That Everybody Had When They Were A Little Kid Who Would Let You Borrow Any Of His Stuff If You Would Just Be His Friend. That's What The Library Is. A Government Funded Pathetic Friend.

I Mean, She's Giving And Caring And Genuinely Concerned About The Welfare Of Others. I Can't Be With Someone Like That.

You Have To Motivate Yourself With Challenges. That's How You Know You're Still Alive.

I Know I'm Not Going To Understand Women. I'll Never Understand How You Can Take Boiling Hot Wax, Pour It Onto Your Upper Thigh, Rip The Hair Out By The Root, And Still Be Afraid Of A Spider.