The United States Has Launched Airstrikes Against

Kids In Washington Every Year Have The Big Easter Egg Roll On The White House Lawn. The Kids Found 300 Easter Eggs. They Also Found About 10,000 Missing Hillary Emails.

Meryl Streep Is On The Program Tonight. I Like To Throw Her A Little Work Whenever I Can.

I Don't Mind Being Accused Of Being A Bad Comedian And I Don't Even Mind Being Accused Of Being A Bad Talk-show Host, But I Never Want To Be Accused Of Being An Arrogant, Pompous Showbiz Asshole.

The New Cia Torture Report Is 6 Million Pages Long. It's Almost As Long As A George Clooney Pre-nup.

I Was Talking To A Friend About Santorum. He Said, 'for All My Years In The State Department, I Know One Thing. Terrorists, What They Fear Most Is A Guy In A Sweater Vest.'