The Quick Success Was A Bit Strange

I Really Believe In Completely Being Naive And Having High Hopes When Meeting Someone New. I Can Kind Of Re-do My Stupidity Or My Naivete.

I Feel Like I'm 100 Years Old. I Can't Tell You What I Did Today. I Can't Tell You What I Did For Seven Years. I Can't Tell You. It Happens So Seamlessly - I'm Just Floating Along And Seven Years Go By.

I Volunteered At Ucla's Occupational Therapy Ward, Where There Are Lots Of Kids With Autism And Emotional Problems. I Just Wanted To Prove To Myself That I Could Not Break Down And Cry At Everything, And That I Could Just Help Somebody Else. The One Thing I Really Remember Was That When We Would Take Them Out Of The Hospital For A Walk Around Campus, They Would Freak Out The Most When We Were Waiting For The Elevator. I Remember The Guy At The Elevator Said To Himself, "transitions Are The Hardest." And I Said To Myself, "transitions Are Always The Hardest."

I'd Say That I've Been Reclusive The Last 34 Years. That Was My Big Thing As A Kid, Staying Home From School. I've Trained Myself To Be Psychosomatically Sick A Lot. Anytime I Go Out, It Is Just Something To Deal With, Even Walking To The Grocery Store. If I'm Supposed To Go From One Place To Another Place That Isn't That Comfortable, I Usually Don't Go.

There Are Lots Of Poster Children For Angst. But There Aren't Many Poster Children For Cool Angst. Everybody Thinks It's Cool If You're The Bad Girl. But What About The People Who Are Really Not Feeling That Great? Why Can't I Get Up In Front Of Millions Of People, As A Person Who Represents My Generation, And Tell Them That I'm Angry? Who Puts These Limits On What My Personality Should Be In Public?