The Married Man Has All But Eliminated

I Had A Very Italian House - The "plastic Furniture You Couldn't Sit On" House. Did Anybody Have The Museum House? For A Kid It's Traumatic. Towels You Can Never Touch. China No One's Ever Gonna Use. Everything Is For A Special Occasion That Never Happens. My Mother Was Waiting For The Pope To Show Up For Dinner. Or Sinatra. Or Chachi.

Without Identical Twins, You'll Never Get To Experience Entering A Hotel Room With One Of Them And Watching Him Run Into The Full-length Mirror Because He Though He Saw His Brother.

Why Can't I Love Him (a 2 Yr Old Nephew) From Afar? That's How I Want To Love Him - Through Pictures And Folklore.

In School, I Wasn't A Very Good Student - I Was Very Irresponsible And Never Did The Studying But Always Liked To Get The Laugh.

I Don't Think Men Talk As Much As Women, But When We Have Something On Our Minds We'll Get It Out.