The Conscious Mind Is The Editor, And

I've Decided To Take Up Smoking, My Doctor Said I Wasn't Getting Enough Tar.

I Always Felt The Audience Sorta Tolerated The Serious Musical Parts While I Was Doing My Comedy.

Hosting The Oscars Is Much Like Making Love To A Woman. It's Something I Only Get To Do When Billy Crystal Is Out Of Town.

The Self-prepared Dinner Is A Great Time Killer For Lonely People And As Much Time Should Be Spent On It As Possible.

I Would Like A Wine. The Purpose Of The Wine Is To Get Me Drunk. A Bad Wine Will Get Me As Drunk As A Good Wine. I Would Like The Good Wine. And Since The Result Is The Same No Matter Which Wine I Drink, I'd Like To Pay The Bad Wine Price.