Stand-up Comedy Is Like The Lowest Medium

I Do What I Can Do When I Can Do It.

Yeah, It's Unfair That You Can Get Judged By Something You Didn't Do, But It's Also Unfair That You Can Inherit Money That You Didn't Work For.

You Know Those Guys That Go To The Strip Club At The Daytime? If You're At A Strip Club, And The Sun Is Out, You Got Some Problems!

I Literally Don't Know What I'm Going To Do Next. That's Successful.

Women Can Have All The Evidence But They Still Want The Confession.