Sport Is A Loathsome And Dangerous Pursuit.

I Was Born With A Priceless Gift, The Ability To Laugh At The Misfortunes Of Others.

I Drift Along, Thinking About The Past A Great Deal. The Past Is So Reliable, So Delightful, And The Best Place To Live. I End Up There Quite Often, You Know; It's Very Comfortable And Dependable.

Sport Is A Loathsome And Dangerous Pursuit.

If You Can't Laugh At Yourself, You May Be Missing The Colossal Joke Of The Century.

Sex Is The Most Beautiful Thing That Can Take Place Between A Happily Married Man And His Secretary.