Silence Is Of The Gods; Only Monkeys

A Comedian Does Funny Things. A Good Comedian Does Things Funny.

Is Hollywood The Cruelest City In The World? Well, It Can Be. New York Can Be That, Too. You Can Be A Broadway Star Here One Night, And Something Happens, And Out--nobody Knows You On The Street. They Forget You Ever Lived. It Happens In Hollywood, Too.

Charlie Chaplin And I Would Have A Friendly Contest: Who Could Do The Feature Film With The Least Subtitles?

I`ve Had Few Dull Moments [in My Life] And Not Too Many Sad And Defeated Ones. In Saying This I Am By No Means Overlooking The Rough And Rocky Years I`ve Lived Through. But I Was Not Brought Up Thinking Life Would Be Easy. I Always Expected To Work Hard For My Money And To Get Nothing I Did Not Earn. And The Bad Years, It Seems To Me, Were So Few That Only A Dyed-in-the-wool Grouch Who Enjoys Feeling Sorry For Himself Would Complain.

I Don't Act, Anyway. The Stuff Is All Injected As We Go Along. My Pictures Are Made Without Script Or Written Directions Of Any Kind