Saying That You Don't Believe In Magic

There Was One Time Where I Failed To Perform Sexually. My Girlfriend Said To Me "oh Don't Worry, It Happens To A Lot Of Guys". Ok, There Are Two Things Wrong With That. First Of All Who Are These Other Guys?, And Second Of All If It's Happening To More Than One Of Us, Don't You Think It Could Be Your Fault?

You Go, Well You Can't Joke About Race. Well If You're From A Different Race And That's Your Experience Of The World And You Want To Talk About That, Then Fine. Or You Can't Talk About Disability, But Disabled Comics Can Talk About That.

The Reason Old Man Use Viagra Is Not That They Are Impotent. It's That Old Women Are So Very Ugly.

How Many Airports Are There In The World?

A Big Girl Once Came Up To Me After A Show And Said "i Think You're Fatist." I Said "no, No. I Think You're Fattest."