Rick Santorum Is So Conservative; He Thinks

At A Press Conference Yesterday Nasa Announced That 2005 Was The Hottest Year On Record. It Is So Hot, And Global Warming Is So Bad, If The Presidential Election Were Held Today, Al Gore Would Still Lose.

When Did The Government Become Our Psycho Ex-girlfriend

According To The Latest L.a. Times Poll, 75% Of Californians Believe The Country Is Headed In The Wrong Direction. And 60% Of Californians Are So Disillusioned, They're Thinking About Moving Back To Mexico.

As If This Whole Thing Isn't Confusing Enough, Election Officials Announced This Week That The Alphabet On The Ballot Will Begin With The Letter R, Then W, Then Q. You Know, Even Sesame Street Is Laughing At California Now.

President Obama Is Currently On A Week-long Trip To Africa, Where He Will Promote Freedom, Democracy, And Economic Opportunity. I Guess He Figured It Hasn't Worked Here - So Try It Somewhere Else.