President Bush Has Unveiled His First Campaign

The Supreme Court Has Ruled That Anybody Can Be Strip-searched For Any Kind Of Arrest. That's Something To Think About The Next Time You Bring 12 Items Into A 10-item-or-less Lane.

I Went Into A Mcdonald's Yesterday And Said, 'i'd Like Some Fries.' The Girl At The Counter Said, 'would You Like Some Fries With That?'

The Democratic Convention Is $27 Million In Debt. They Had To Cancel The Kick-off Event At The Charlotte Motor Speedway. A Speedway Is The Perfect Place For The Democratic Convention. You Go Around In Circles, Turn Left Every Few Seconds, And You End Up Right Where You Started.

According To A New Un Report, The Global Warming Outlook Is Much Worse Than Originally Predicted. Which Is Pretty Bad, When They Originally Predicted It Would Destroy The Planet.

Martha Stewart Is Now Under House Arrest. So She'll Go To Her $40 Million 153-acre Estate. So She's Going From The Big House To An Even Bigger House.