One Tequila, Two Tequila, Three Tequila, Floor.

When People Say “clean As A Whistle”, They Forget That A Whistle Is Full Of Spit.

If One Synchronized Swimmer Drowns, Do The Rest Drown Too?

How Come When It's Us, It's An Abortion, And When It's A Chicken, It's An Omelette? Are We So Much Better Than Chickens All Of A Sudden? When Did This Happen; That We Passed Chickens In Goodness? Name Six Ways We're Better Than Chickens. See, Nobody Can Do It! You Know Why? 'cause Chickens Are Decent People.

Don't Sweat The Petty Things And Don't Pet The Sweaty Things.

People Always Tell Me "have A Nice Day." Well What If I Don't Want To? What If I Want To Have A Crappy Day?