Oh, Wouldn't The World Seem Dull And

If The Jests That You Crack Have An Orthodox Smack, You May Get A Bland Smile From These Sages; But Should It, By Chance, Be Imported From France, Half-a-crown Is Stopped Out Of Your Wages!

Bow, Bow, Ye Lower Middle Classes! Bow, Bow, Ye Tradesmen, Bow, Ye Masses!

Bless Your Heart, They Don't Mind--they're Exceedingly Kind-- They Don't Blame You--as Long As You're Funny!

See How The Fates Their Gifts Allot, For A Is Happy-b Is Not. Yet B Is Worthy, I Dare Say, Of More Prosperity Than A.

I Am The Captain Of The Pinafore ; And A Right Good Captain Too! . . . . And I'm Never, Never Sick At Sea! What, Never? No, Never! What Never? Hardly Ever! He's Hardly Ever Sick At Sea! Then Give Three Cheers, And One Cheer More, For The Hardy Captain Of The Pinafore!