Oh Satan You're A Wily One.

The Afghan Government Is As Corrupt As A Prostitute With A Law Degree.

I Knew That I Had Been Partially Right In The Storeroom Above The Bar On Christmas Day. Whoever I Had Become Had To Die.

It Seemed That I Performed Better Sober Than Drunk. Who Knew?

By The Power Of Steven Wright's Beard!

Confession Is A Sacred Rite Enhanced By Allegory, Exaggeration, And Lies.