My Stand-up Is Quite Good Now, People

They Say The Universe Started With A Big Bang. I Hope Everybody Stood Well Back.

I Use A Bruce Lee Technique: "the Way Of No Way". He Had The Idea That He Would Learn Everything, So That Whoever He Had To Fight, He Could Improvise Anything. The Best Way Of Starting A Gig Is Just To Not Think Of Anything - To Clear Your Mind, Not In An Empty Zen State, But More Just To Go On And See Where You Go.

It's My Manifest Destiny To Wear A Skirt In All Countries.

You Have The American Dream! The Dream Is To Be Born In A Gutter And Grow Up, And Then Get All The Money In The World And Stick It In Your Ears And Go Thbbbbbt.

Because That's What Narcissism Is All About; Looking In The Mirror Everyday And Thinking 'damn, I'd Like To Shag Myself.'