My Mother Kept The House Clean And

It's Not Easy Being A Father, But I've Been Allowed A Comeback.

We Get The Worrywart, The Hypochondriac, The Money-grubbing Miser, The Intractable Negotiator... Some Would Say Certain Of These Refer To The Stereotypical, Or 'stage' Jew. But Objectively Speaking, The Only Crime In Humor Is An Unfunny Joke.

I Won't Eat In A Place That Has Suits Of Armor.

Modesty Is Not One Of My Virtues.

My Son Says I Never Tell Stories About Anyone Who's Living.