My Girlfriend Works At Hooters. In The

Magicians Disappear All The Time, But As Soon As A Regular Person Does It, Everyone Is All Scared. "tom's Gone!" "is He A Magician?" "no." "then Let's Print Up Some Flyers!"

I Bought A Seven-dollar Pen Because I Always Lose Pens And I Got Sick Of Not Caring.

Yeah, I'm Not Into Sports. If Someone Told Me I Had Athlete's Foot, I'd Say That's Not My Foot!

At My Hotel Room, My Friend Came Over And Asked To Use The Phone. I Said Certainly. He Said Do I Need To Dial 9 I Say Yeah. Especially If It's In The Number. You Can Try Four And Five Back To Back Real Quick.

I Have A Few Cavities. I Don't Like To Call Them Cavities, Though - I Like To Call Them 'places To Put Stuff'. 'do You Know Where I Can Store A Pea' 'yes, I Have Some Locations Available.'