Meow” Means “woof” In Cat.

I Had Run Away From Home Three Times. I Had Been Kicked Out Of Three Different Schools Under Different Circumstances. I Was Kicked Out Of Everything That I Didn't Quit. Kicked Out Of Schools. Kicked Out Of Summer Camp, The Boy Scouts, The Altar Boys, The Choir, And Something Else That I Can't Think Of, That I'm Proud Of. Anyway, That Was My Pattern. I Just Began To Invent Myself Early In Life, And Went Out And Did Something About It.

You Know What They Want? They Want Obedient Workers. Obedient Workers, People Who Are Just Smart Enough To Run The Machines And Do The Paperwork. And Just Dumb Enough To Passively Accept All These Increasingly Shittier Jobs With The Lower Pay, The Longer Hours, The Reduced Benefits, The End Of Overtime And Vanishing Pension That Disappears The Minute You Go To Collect It. And Now They're Coming For Your Social Security Money. They Want Your F**kin' Retirement Money. They Want It Back So They Can Give It To Their Criminal Friends On Wall Street.

I Knew A Transsexual Guy Whose Only Ambition Is To Eat, Drink, And Be Mary.

Comedy Is A Socially Acceptable Form Of Hostility And Aggression. That Is What Comics Do, Stand The World Upside Down.

Test Of Metal: Will Of Iron, Nerves Of Steel, Heart Of Gold, Balls Of Brass.