Love Is An Optical Illusion That Makes

Among The Gods, There Is A Dispute As To Which One Of Them Originally Thought Of Christianity; Or, As They Call It, The Great Leg Pull. Apollo Has The Best Claim, But A Sizeable Minority Support Pluto, Ex-god Of The Dead, On The Grounds That He Has A Really Sick Sense Of Humour. How Would It Be, Suggested The Unidentified God, If First We Tell Them All To Love Their Neighbour, Pack In The Killing And Thieving, And Be Nice To Each Other. Then We Let Them Start Burning Heretics.

I Try And Do 2,500 Words A Day, Every Day Of The Year

At Any Given Time, Ninety-nine-point-nine-five Per Cent Of The Human Race Are A Confounded Nuisance

Mostly I Sit At Home In The Evenings Watching The Box And Hoping That One Day I'll Evolve Into Plankton.

The Best Definition Of An Immortal Is Someone Who Hasn't Died Yet.