Lip-synching?! Let That Be A Lesson. If

Let's Be Honest, Half The Marriages End In Divorce. For Me, It's Never Made Much Sense. I Have A Girlfriend And I'm Not Interested In Anyone Else, But I Still Wouldn't Want To Bring The Federal And State Government Into My Life.

Canadian Bacon Isn't Bacon. It's Ham.

Sex Is Too Easy For Women To Get, And Too Hard For Men. I Mean, Honestly, For A Man To Walk Into Someplace And Have Every Woman Ready To Take Him Home, He'd Have To Rule The World. A Woman Would Have To Do Her Hair.

Republicans Stand By Their Convictions. Stupid, Ignorant, World-destroying Convictions Based On Disproven Economic Fantasies And Ancient Books Full Of Primitive Morality And Magic People. But Convictions, Nonetheless.

There Are Two Things That You Have To Lie To Get Through. One Is Politics, And The Other Is Marriage.