Laughter Brings Out The Child In All

It Doesn't Make Any Difference How Much Money A Father Earns, His Name Is Always Dad-can-i.... Like All Other Children, My Five Have One Great Talent: They Are Gifted Beggars. Not One Of Them Ever Ran Into The Room, Looked Up At Me, And Said, "i'm Really Happy That You're My Father, And As A Tangible Token Of My Appreciation, Here's A Dollar.

Kids Need To Remember That When You Put Something On Twitter, It's Not Like Whispering To Your Friend, You've Put It On A Billboard That The Whole World, Including Your Own Kids Someday, Can See.

What Best Defines A Child Is The Total Inability To Receive Information From Anything Not Plugged In.

I'm Not Going Out And Hitting A 95-mph Fastball Where I Can't See The Stitches. I'm Not On A Professional Football Team Looking To Tackle A Fullback Who Is Built Like Solid Wood. I'm A Thinking Person, And I've Been Blessed With The Ability To See Some Things And Talk About Them In A Way That Registers In A Humorous And Funny Way.

My Mother Comes In My Room And Says, "just Look At This Mess! This Is A Pig Sty!" Now, I've Already Been In The Room Five Hours, And She Wants Me To Look At It.