It Took Me Fifteen Years To Discover

What Is The Disease Which Manifests Itself In An Inability To Leave A Party--any Party At All--until It Is All Over And The Lightsare Being Put Out?... I Suppose That Part Of This Mania For Staying Is Due To A Fear That, If I Go, Something Good Will Happen And I'll Miss It. Somebody Might Do Card Tricks, Or Shoot Somebody Else.

Birds Which Are The Same Color As The Foliage In Which They Nest Are Less Likely To Be Disturbed By Other Birds Who Want To Drop In And Chat, And Therefore Last Longer.

There Is Probably No Moment More Appalling Than That In Which The Tongue Comes Suddenly Upon The Ragged Edge Of A Space From Which The Old Familiar Filling Has Disappeared.

A Man Of Forty Today Has Nothing To Worry Him But Falling Hair, Inability To Button The Top Button, Failing Vision, Shortness Of Breath, A Tendency Of The Collar To Shut Off All Breathing, Trembling Of The Kidneys To Whatever Tune The Orchestra Is Playing, And A General Sense Of Giddiness When The Matter Of Rent Is Brought Up. Forty Is Life's Golden Age.

An Ardent Supporter Of The Hometown Team Should Go To A Game Prepared To Take Offense, No Matter What Happens.