...it Is Prodigious The Quantity Of Good

Strangers Are Welcome Because There Is Room Enough For Them All, And Therefore The Old Inhabitants Are Not Jealous Of Them; The Laws Protect Them Sufficiently So That They Have No Need Of The Patronage Of Great Men; And Every One Will Enjoy Securely The Profits Of His Industry. But If He Does Not Bring A Fortune With Him, He Must Work And Be Industrious To Live.

For Over 1,700 Years, The Jews Have Been Bewailing Their Sad Fate In That They Have Been Exiled From Their Homeland, As They Call Palestine. But Gentlemen, Did The World Give It To Them In Fee Simple, They Would At Once Find Some Reason For Not Returning. Why? Because They Are Vampires, And Vampires Do Not Live On Vampires. They Cannot Live Only Among Themselves. They Must Subsist On Christians And Other People Not Of Their Race.

Be In General Virtuous, And You Will Be Happy. At Least, You Will By Such Conduct, Stand The Best Chance For Such Consequences.

I Wish It Were Possible, From This Instance, To Invent A Method Of Embalming Drowned Persons In Such A Manner That They May Be Recalled To Life At Any Period, However Distant; For Having A Very Ardent Desire To See And Observe The State Of America A Hundred Years Hence, I Should Prefer To Any Ordinary Death The Being Immersed In A Cask Of Madeira Wine With A Few Friends Till That Time, To Be Then Recalled To Life By The Solar Warmth Of My Dear Country!

Eat What You Like, But Dress For Other People.