In Golf, Humiliations Are The Essence Of

I Hasten To Say To Snobs From The Surrey Pine-and-sand Country That No Invention Since The Corn Plaster Or The Electric Toothbrush Has Brought Greater Balm To The Extremities Of The Senior Golfer Than The Golfmobile, A Word That Will Have To Do For Want Of A Better.

So The British, Of All Ages, Still Walk The Course. On Trips To Florida Or The American Desert, They Still Marvel, Or Shudder, At The Fleets Of Electric Carts Going Off In The Morning Like The First Assault Wave At The Battle Of El Alamein. It Is Unlikely, For Some Time, That A Briton Will Come Across In His Native Land Such A Scorecard As Henry Longhurst Rescued From A California Club And Cherished Till The Day He Died. The Last On Its List Of Local Rules Printed The Firm Warning "a Player On Foot Has No Standing On The Course."

Like A Christening, A Wedding, A Graduation Ceremony, A Holy War, A Revolutioneven?a Fireworksdisplay, Agaudy Promise Of What Life Ought To Be, Not Life Itself.

The Masters Is More Like A Vast Edwardian Garden Party Than A Golf Tournament.

Washington's Birthday Is As Close To A Secular Christmas As Any Christian Country Dare Come This Side Of Blasphemy.