I'm So Thankful. God Has Been So

Well What I Would Really Like Is A Bunch Of Little N***ers To Wear Long-sleeve White Shirts, Black Shorts And Black Bow Ties. You Know, In The Shirley Temple Days, They Used To Tap Dance Around. Now, That Would Be A True Southern Wedding Wouldn't It? But We Can't Do That Because The Media Would Be On Me About That.

A Balanced Diet Is A Cookie In Both Hands.

Down South, Even Our Vegetables Have Some Pig Hidden Somewhere In It. A Vegetable Isn't A Vegetable Without A Little Ham Hock.

I'm So Glad I'm Not A Dentist. How Many Times Does Someone Say, 'oh, Doc, It Felt So Good When You Were Drilling My Teeth'? Never. But When You Give Someone A Wonderful Cookie, You Put A Little Of Yourself In, And You See Someone's Face Light Up - That's Immediate Approval.

Southerners Have Never Been Afraid Of Seasoning. It's Kind Of The Other Way Around; Our Seasoning Is Afraid Of Us.