I'm Greek. My Body Produces Feta Cheese.

There Was A Long Time Where I Was An "artist" In Quotes, Who Had No Money. But I Guess Back Then I Also Never Had A Girlfriend.

That's One Of The Great Things About Comedy: We Can - And Should - Say The Things That Other People Aren't Supposed To Say. If We Didn't Do That, If We Didn't Push Against Those Limits, We'd Just Be Standing Around Onstage And Yelling.

Actually, I Used To Be A Busboy In A Strip Joint In New York And So I Hate Strip Joints. I'm Not That Kind Of Person.

Do You Remember That Kid That Had Sex With His High School Teacher? I Was Reading Online That He Died Today. He Died From Hi-fiveing.

I Don't Really Have A Pattern Yet. I Don't Know If I'll Develop One. As Far As Comedic Integrity, I Don't Have Integrity In General, Comedic Or Otherwise.