I'm Basically Always On Tour.

My Friend Anderson Cooper Is The Scion Of One Of America's Great Shipping And Railroad Families, The Vanderbilts.

Well, The Coffeehouse Audiences Never Know What They're Going To Get, And All The Comics Are Different, As Opposed To When You Go To A Club, And They're Pretty Much All Telling Jokes With Set-ups And Punchlines. Coffeehouse Audiences Are The Most Forgiving: They Really Listen, Which Is The Best Part.

I'm Always Listening And Watching; My Ear Is Like A Boom Mike. And Judging, Frankly. Constantly Judging.

When My Pals In High School Were Starting To Drink, It Always Looked Unappealing To Me. I Would Be At A Big Party And See One Of The Popular Girls Or Football Players Completely Wasted And Puking And Acting A Fool, And Think To Myself, There Is Nothing Cool About That. I Never Wanted To Be That Out Of Control.

I Actually Have To Pick And Chose Stuff That I Know I'm Going To Bomb At.