I'm A Very Bad Student, But A

Use A Screwdriver Instead Of A Hammer. Try To Untighten The Nut With Your Hand. Utilize The Path Of Least Resistance First.

I Love Women. I Actually Prefer Girls, As A Parent, Because They Disappoint At A Different Age. They Go Through That, "dad's An Idiot," Which Lasted A Little Longer Than I'd Like.

My Stepfather Stepped In Where No Man Would've Stepped In - Six Kids, Five Of Them Boys - And That's Heroic.

I May Go Back And Spice It Up With A Little Bit Of The Tool Stuff And Grunting And All That That I Know So Well. But It Feels Like I'm Rehashing Old Material. And Some Of My Audiences Like That. So I'm There To Entertain. I'm Not There To Make A Political Statement Or Anything Like That. I'm There To Entertain.

Women Are Brilliant. Every Woman Knows How To Do The Weirdest Thing Right Out Of The Bucket. Every Woman Knows How To Do That Hindu Head Wrap With The Towel Out Of The Shower. A Typhoon Couldn't Blow That Thing Off Their Heads. Ever Try To Do That? You Look Like A Drunk Iraqi Soldier.