If You Can't Laugh At Yourself, You

If You Have To Explain Satire To Someone, You Might As Well Give Up.

Sport Is A Loathsome And Dangerous Pursuit.

I Think A Lot Of People Think That We [comedians] Are Nerveless People In The Theatre, That We Don't Feel That Kind Of Terror Which Traditionally Anyone Who Has To Do Any Public Speaking Feels. It's Worse For Actors, Because Our Livelihood Depends On It.

The Whole Point Of Art, Aside From The Aesthetic Pleasure It Yields, Is That It Provides A Bridge To The Past; That Seductive Land Where We All Find Certainty And Consolation. Nothing Quite Spans This Gulf With Such Immediacy As The Art Of Popular Song.

New Zealand Is A Country Of Thirty Thousand Million Sheep, Three Million Of Whom Think They Are Human.