If I Had Wanted To Ice The

Never Ever Discount The Idea Of Marriage. Sure, Someone Might Tell You That Marriage Is Just A Piece Of Paper. Well, So Is Money, And What's More Life-affirming Than Cold, Hard Cash?

I'd Rather Be Funny Than Wise.

I Haven't Seen Someone So Overmatched Since Mike Tyson Tried To Recite The Alphabet.

I'm Like Bush, I See The World More Like Checkers Than Chess.

South African Schoolchildren Set A World Record This Week By Creating The World's Longest Clothesline. Hey, What Do South Africans Wash Their Clothes With? Apar-tide!