If A Job's Worth Doing, It's Too

If Your Boss Gets Drunk And Offers To Photocopy Her Posterior, Do Not Helpfully Suggest Pressing Reduce 75%.

Aim Low, Reach Your Goals, And Avoid Disappointment.

There Are Always Deadlines I Have To Meet. I Don't Let Myself Get Too Close To The Deadlines, So It's Not Like I'm Just Sweating Bullets Or Anything If The Clock Is Ticking. I Never Let Myself Get In That Situation.

I Was Surprised To Learn That Doing Household Chores Qualifies As Romantic For Most Of You [women]. That's Exactly Why You Should Never Hire A Butler If You Strike It Rich - The Minute That Jeeves Starts Unloading The Dishwasher Without Being Asked, Your Wife Is Going To Start Humping His Leg.

There Is No Idea So Bad That It Cannot Be Made To Look Brilliant With The Proper Application Of Fonts And Color.