I'd Rather Have Two Girls At Seventeen

If I Could Get My Membership Fee Back, I'd Resign From The Human Race.

The Average Vice-president Is A Form Of Executive Fungus That Attaches Itself To A Desk. On A Boat This Growth Would Be Called A Barnacle.

My Agent Gets 10 Percent Of Everything I Get, Except The Blinding Headaches.

I Play A Musical Instrument A Little, But Only For My Own Amazement.

An Advertising Agency Is 85 Percent Confusion And 15 Percent Commission.