I Was Broadcast-struck From An Early Age;

How Come There's Only One Monopolies Commission?

It Is Part Of Politics To Make Things Look Better Than They Really Are. What Is A Spin Doctor But A Serial Euphemiser?

Lord Castlerosse Was Taken To Task By Nancy Astor Over The Size Of His Stomach. 'what Would You Say If That Was On A Woman?' She Asked, Pointedly. 'half An Hour Ago It Was,' He Replied.

My Toils In The Quotation Field Have Led Me To Formulate Two Or Three Laws About The Way People Use And Abuse Quotations. My First Law Is: When In Doubt, Ascribe All Quotations To Bernard Shaw - Which I Don't Mean To Be Taken Literally, But As A General Observation Of The Habit People Have Of Attaching Remarks To The Nearest Obvious Speaker. Churchill, Wilde, Orson Welles And Alexander Woollcott Are Other Useful Figures Upon Whom To Father Remarks When You Don't Know Who Really Said Them.

I Was Absolutely A Non-starter At Games. My Report For Rugby Said, 'nigel's Chief Contribution Is His Presence On The Field.' I Used To Pray For Rain And Sometimes It Did Rain - And We Played Anyway.