I Think We All Feel The Same

It Was June 4, 1979, The First Time I Went On Stage. I Didn't Know I Could Do It But I Knew I Couldn't Not Do It. I Quit Everything In My Life And This Was The One Thing I Couldn't Quit.

I'm Not Afraid To Take On Somebody Or Say Something That Somebody Will Find Offensive Because Unfortunately In Comedy, You Can't Say Anything Really Good Without Offending Somebody.

I Can Never Do Nothing In This House!

I Think It's Easier For African American And White Comics To Be Praised Than It Is Latinos Because They Think Our Culture Or Our Humor Is Substandard. I Mean, I Just Don't Think They Want To Give Us Credit. I Just Don't Think That They See Us As Important Enough To Be At Their Level. I'm The Longest-produced Comedy At Warner Bros. And I Don't Feel Special. They Come Over And Say Hello. But Everybody's Gonna Make A Lot Of Money And I Don't Feel Like I'm Special To Them.

David Letterman Is The Best Late-night Talk Show Host Right Now, Hands Down, And Has Been Since He First Took The Desk.