I Still Feel Thirty, Except When I

I Was Not Influenced By Jack Benny, And People Have Remarked On My Timing And Jack's Timing, But I Don't Think You Can Teach Timing. It's Something You Hear In Your Head.

I Think You Should Be A Child For As Long As You Can. I Have Been Successful For 74 Years Being Able To Do That. Don't Rush Into Adulthood, It Isn't All That Much Fun.

More And More, As I Get Older, People Come Up To Me And Say, 'thank You For All The Laughter.' And My Standard Answer Is, 'it Was My Pleasure.' But That's The Truth.

One Of The First Things That You Learn As A Stand-up Is, You're The Boss. It's Your Stage, And Don't Screw With Me Because I'll Make You Look Bad, Which I Had To Do, Because You Wind Up With Drunks And Loud People.

You Shouldn't Get Too Close To The Truth, Because Then Maybe You Stop Being Funny.