I Spent All Night Feeding The Homeless

I Wish My Family Had Taken More Pictures When I Was Growing Up. Instead Of Always Having To Draw Everything.

I Don't Have A Type, Really. But I've Always Been More Attracted To Girls Who Yell Fire.

I Was A Weird Kid Because I Liked To Be Alone, But I Craved Attention. It Was Important For Me To Be Cool, But I Couldn't Keep My Mouth Shut. So I Was Either Talking For The Sake Of Talking, Or I Was Curled Up With A Book Somewhere Hiding From Everyone.

The Best Way To Break Up With A Girl Is Like I'm Taking Off A Band-aid. Slowly And In The Shower.

2010 Has Been Awesome. I Got To Write On The David Hasselhoff Roast This Summer, And That's Always Been A Dream.