I Recently Turned 60. Practically A Third

In New York State They Have A Strange Law That Says You Can't Get A Divorce Unless You Can Prove Adultery - And It's Weird, Because The Ten Commandments Say 'thou Shalt Not Commit Adultery.' But New York State Says You Have To. Well, Finally, What Happened Was That My Wife Committed Adultery For Me. She's Always Been More Mechanically Inclined Than I Have.

Cynicism Is Reality With An Alternate Spelling.

Don't Knock Masturbation. It's Sex With Someone I Love.

Between The Pope And Air Conditioning, I'd Choose Air Conditioning.

Dying Is One Of The Few Things That Can Be Done As Easily Lying Down.