I Never Knew Anyone Yet Who Got

Infants Need The Most Sleep, And, What Is More, Get It. Stunning Them With A Soft, Padded Hammer Is The Best Way To Insure Their Getting It At The Right Times.

I Have Often Wondered How They Manage To Get Return Envelopes Which Miss, By One-quarter Of An Inch, Fitting The Blank You Are Supposed To Return. They Say, "please Fill Out And Return The Enclosed Envelope," And The Enclosed Envelope Is Always One-quarter Of An Inch Too Small.

It Is Rather To Be Chosen Than Great Riches, Unless I Have Omitted Something From The Quotation.

I Have Been Told By Hospital Authorities That More Copies Of My Works Are Left Behind By Departing Patients Than Those Of Any Other Author.

Defining And Analyzing Humor Is A Pastime Of Humorless People.