I May Have Been A Complete Lunatic,

Can I Tell You Something You Really Don't Want To Hear? He's Going To Break Up With You. - Stuart

Being An Author Means, Almost By Definition, That You Make Up Characters And Then Complicate Their Lives. That's It, Really. You Make Up Characters And Give Them Problem After Problem After Problem.

My Rule Is: The Second You Find Yourself Doing Something You Hate, Quit Doing It.

I Envisioned Huge Piles Of The Elf Hotel Flying Off The Belt, Taking Down Everybody In Sight. I Had Seen Pictures Of That Elf Hotel - It Had Sharp Candy-cane Spires That Could Easily Impale Someone. If Anyone Was Ever Going To Be Killed By An Elf Hotel, It Would Be My Parents.

Sometimes I Even Felt Like He Dated Me As Part Of His Plan, Like They Were Going To Have A Checklist On The Application, And One Of The Things To Tick Off Was Going To Be, "do You Have A Reasonably Intelligent Girlfriend Who Shares Your Aspirations, And Who Is Fully Prepared To Accept Your Limited Availability?