I’m In Pain. That’s The Only Way

My Time In The Arena Made Me Realize How I Needed To Stop Punishing [my Mother] For Something She Couldn't Help, Specifically The Crushing Depression She Fell Into After My Father's Death. Because Sometimes Things Happen To People And They're Not Equipped To Deal With Them.

They're Betting On How Long I'll Live!" I Burst Out. "they're Not My Friends!" "well, Try And Pretend!" Snaps Effie. Then She Composes Herself And Beams At Me. "see, Like This. I'm Smiling At You Even Though You're Aggravating Me.

And Don't You Let Your Guard Down For A Second Because You Think Anything's Inevitable.

There's No Point In Comforting Words, In Telling Her She'll Be All Right. She's No Fool. Her Hand Reaches Out And I Clutch It Like A Lifeline. As If It's Me Who's Dying Instead Of Rue.

Charred Bits Of Black Silk Swirl Into The Air, And Pearls Clatter To The Stage… I’m In A Dress Of The Exact Design Of My Wedding Dress, Only It’s The Color Of Coal And Made Of Tiny Feathers. Wonderingly, I Lift My Long, Flowing Sleeves Into The Air, And That’s When I See Myself On The Television Screen. Clothed In Black Except For The White Patches On My Sleeves. Or Should I Say My Wings. Because Cinna Had Turned Me Into A Mockingjay.