I Know My Body. What Happened Is

The First Year With Abt I Learned 13 New Roles. Most Were Lengthy Ballets, More Complicated Than I Was Used To. I Have Suffered From Tendinitis Since I Was 13, And It Flared Up Again Until The Pain Was Paralyzing. There Were Times I Prayed I'd Be Sick So I Wouldn't Have To Go On.

I Embarked On A Risky Course Of Plastic Surgery And Silicone Injections, Major Dental Realignments And Gruesome Medical Procedures. I Pray That Young Dancers, Those Who Imitate Me At Their Peril, Will Avoid This Blind Alley. It Is More Than A Dead End; It Is A Dead Beginning.

The Nature Of My Compulsion Was Such That I Danced In My Sleep. The Entire Household Was Sometimes Awakened By Loud Thumping Sounds Coming From My Room.

You've Got To Break Through This Idea Of Being Light As A Ballerina. The Heavier You'll Feel, The Lighter You'll Look.

Often, When You've Reached A Very High Level Of Achievement, You Almost Become Paralyzed By The Idea That Anything You Might Do Might Be Imperfect. Perfection Is Just The Striving, The Effort, The Struggle, But It's Hard To Remember That.