I Had No Idea This Thing Was

Have You Been Following The Big Oil Spill In The Gulf Of Mexico? Or As We Call It Now, The Dead Sea.

Osama Bin Laden... Lived In One House For, Like, Six Years With Three Wives. And Earlier Today, They Ruled His Death Was A Suicide.

A Guy In Pennsylvania Was Arrested Because He Was Drunk In His Golf Cart Going From Bar To Bar. So They Arrested Him. I Said: Wait A Minute. Isn't That Golf?

Tip To Out-of-town Visitors. If You Buy Something Here In New York And You Want To Have It Shipped Home, Be Suspicious If The Clerk Tells You They Don't Need Your Name And Address.

It's Official, Arnold Said He Will Enter The Race For Governor. At Least That's What Everybody Thinks He Said.