I Feel Like, Even In This Crazy

Now The Thanksgiving Meal Is Just So Unnecessarily Difficult. I Mean Even Mashed Potatoes - It's Like The Most Difficult Kind Of, You Know, Medieval Idea. All Right, Instead Of Just Cooking Them, Why Don't You Spend, Like, Eight Hours Peeling Them And Then We'll Have To Mash Them Up. It Feels Like Prison Labor, Really.

I Think The Worst Professional Advice I Received Was This Kind Of Unspoken Message Of "sit Back And Wait Your Turn," Or "sit Back And Wait And Let Other People Do Things."

Bacon Bits Are Like The Fairy Dust Of The Food Community.

I Think It's Great Some Hotels Provide Stationery. Because The First Thing I Like To Do When I Get To A Hotel Room Is Write A Letter. "my Dearest Gwendolyn, I Arrived By Nightfall At The Embassy Suites. It Will Be A Fortnight After My Return That This Letter Shall Arrive. Allow Me To Explain The Curious Charge At The Ledger. It Is Because I Miss Thee So Much, Darling, I Accidentally Ordered Sorrority Sisters 7."

When I Started Stand-up - And This Is In The '90s - There Was Definitely People Hadn't Watched Decades Of Comedy Central, Where People Are Really Much More Educated On Stand-up Comedy.