I Don't Wear No Condom And I

I'm Not Going Out And Hitting A 95-mph Fastball Where I Can't See The Stitches. I'm Not On A Professional Football Team Looking To Tackle A Fullback Who Is Built Like Solid Wood. I'm A Thinking Person, And I've Been Blessed With The Ability To See Some Things And Talk About Them In A Way That Registers In A Humorous And Funny Way.

I Was A Physical Education Major With A Child Psychology Minor At Temple, Which Means If You Ask Me A Question About A Child's Behavior, I Will Advise You To Tell The Child To Take A Lap.

That's Why Ears Have Cartilage, To Keep Them From Flapping.

You Can Turn Painful Situations Around Through Laughter. If You Can Find Humor In Anything, Even Poverty, You Can Survive It.

For College Seniors There Should Be A Week Of Being Allowed To Cry. Just Break Down And Cry Because You Are Scared And Don't Know What's Next.