I Don't Want To Be Stinky Poo

Life Is Not About Focusing On The Obstacles. It's About How You Handle Them, And Whether You Get Enlightenment Or Levity From The Way You Do It

I Don't Even Have Voice Mail Or Answering Machines Anymore. I Hate The Phone, And I Don't Want To Call Anybody Back. If I Go To Hell, It Will Be A Small Closet With A Telephone In It, And I Will Be Doomed And Destined For Eternity To Return Phone Calls.

When They [breasts] Are Huge, You Become Very Self-conscious...i've Learned Something Though, Through My Years Of Pondering And Pontificating, And That Is: Men Love Them, And I Love That.

When I Was A Kid, I Got Really Great Advice From Someone Who Is So Important To Me And Someone Who I Respect So Much, And They Told Me, 'don't Do Too Many Endorsements. Don't Throw Your Name On Things; Think Of Your Longevity.'

Both Of My Marriages Have Taught Me The Same Lesson Twice Over Really Harsh: Listen To Your Instincts. Don't Be A People Pleaser.